Let me start this post of with the following disclaimer.
In no way do I really think I am a terrible mom. I am having a shitty morning and I know things will get better. My children will not become mass murderers because of this morning and life will continue.
Okay- Now that we have that out of the way, DAMN, I am having a bad morning.
Soleil is in an egotistical phase. It is driving me nuts. I hate it I hate it I hate it. All she can think about is herself.
UGH!!! I am so frustrated by this.
Today is photo day at daycare. I carefully selected clothes last night that would coordinate for a sibling photo. We waited until after breakfast to dress the girls. Then Jay wanted a few photos of his own. They did not cooperate.
Finally, he got frustrated and walked away. I talked to him and then to Soleil. I asked her to try to sit nicely for one photo for Daddy. She said No. I don’t want to do that. I asked if she could do this because it was nice for daddy. She didn’t want to. I got frustrated. I asked her why should people be nice to her if she isn’t nice to others? She ignored the question. So I told her that Lil, my stuffed animal, could not go to school today.
The tears! The screams! The crying and sobbing. I have nicely given up my favorite stuffed animal for her to play with. I had my backup auxiliary cat, Frieda, take care of Lil today.
On the ride in, we talked about helping mommy and daddy. Listening to mommy and daddy. Helping the family. Blah blah blah. Then Luna decided she didn’t want her seat belt on. OH My G-d! The screams! You would have thought we were torturing her by making her wear a seat belt in the car.
When we get to daycare, Luna wants Daddy. Nope, Mommy’s taking her in. Now it is "I don’t want my seat belt off!" UGH!
I ended up carrying her in with the "over my shoulder so you can’t hurt me" move. She did get down once and then she started to scratch my neck, she almost ripped my earring out, and she started pulling my hair. Sigh…
I feel like the worst mother in the world on days like this.
How am I raising such a fricking egotistical child? Why? Why? What am I doing wrong?
What is up with Luna? The freak!
Why am I dreaming of just leaving and not coming back?
I don’t care if the kids hate me, I just want them to be respectful adults at some point. UGH
Okay. enough whining. I have some data to cross-correlate.