A matter of trust December 5, 2006
Posted by spacemom in : Kids , 2 commentsSunday was a watershed day. One of those days that I hope to remember forever.
It was evening and Soleil was having an apple snack before bed. I had my legs stretched out and she was resting on them. She looked up at me.
S: "Mom? I broke a rule today"
Me:"hmm, which one? The don’t go on a castle roof one?"
S: "No, I went up on the top bunk while the fan was on"
Me:"Oh, what happened?"
S: "The fan hit my fingers and they got all red. I asked Daddy to turn off the fan"
Me: "Did Daddy get mad at you?"
S: "No, he got me some ice. I’m sorry I broke a rule."
Me: "It’s okay. The reason we have that rule is so you don’t hurt yourself. You broke the rule and guess what? You hurt yourself. Next time, turn off the fan first, okay?"
S: "Okay. Are you mad, mommy?"
Me: "No, I just want you to be safe."
S:"Okay"
The subject then changed. But inside, I was thrilled. Soleil and I just had a discussion about breaking a rule and the consequences. I didn’t yell or freak out on her. I let her explain how things went. Sure, this is a small thing, but this is how you lay out trust. I want both of the girls to feel comfortable with coming to us with a big problem. I don’t want them to be afraid of us yelling or losing it.
And so begins the start of trust.
