So I got a few rather nasty anonymous emails about my post about Congress "recognizing Christmas".
I first want to say, HAVE THE BALLS TO USE YOUR REAL NAMES.
Secondly, for those who don’t see the "shoving down the throat" of Christmas. Take a step back. Ben Franklin, our famous atheist Founding Father, said we need to watch our for "..the tyranny of the majority". Think about that for a second. What does that mean to you, the majority?
Have you had strangers come up to your children and say "Have you been good little girls this year? I hope so! Santa only comes to good children."? Have you had your 3 year old burst into tears because of this? Have you ever had your child ask if we were BAD people because Santa doesn’t come to your house?
How about having your child announce that "my children will be Christian so they can have Santa come"? Replace Christian with any other religion. How would that feel to you?
Has your child ever looked at a Menorah and begged for one in your house? Imagine the reverse. Your child seeing Christmas lights and trying to explain to them that to light the Christmas lights MEANS something to Christians. It’s not all secular as some would have you believe.
Has your 5 year old ever had to comfort the 3 year old by pointing out that Hannukah, a MINOR holiday, gives the kids more gifts than Christmas? Have you had to explain to your children how it is much more fun to have Passover, Rosh Hashannna and Sukkot than just Christmas and Easter? (I’m leaving out Yom Kippur because, well, face it, it’s not a fun day for kids.)
And for those stats you sent me Mr. "George Orwell", 50% of Jewish marriages are interfaith? Yep, 47% of Jews who have married in 1996 are interfaith. About 33% of those marriages have children who are being raised Jewish. And the stat that 70-80% of Jews celebrate Christmas? What the hell are you smoking?
According to the 1990 National
Jewish Population Survey, 82% of Jewish households never have
a Christmas tree.
Dude. Dude…
So yeah, being non-Christian in the United States is really difficult. It’s very hard on kids. One thing that we have learned from Hanukah is this, be true to who you are and don’t change just to fit in. What? You don’t KNOW the Hanukah story? Read and learn.
Yes, Christians are the majority. Yes, Christmas is considered holy by the Christians. No, I don’t mind people saying Merry Christmas. I say Merry Christmas back. No, I certainly don’t mind your Christmas cards. I have many on my fridge. But don’t underestimate what it means to others who don’t celebrate Christmas to have something so obvious "recognized". To some of us, it is another step towards making this a theocracy, not a republic.
People are assholes. That is all.
Sorry about the stupid anons — I CAN’T STAND people who have something hideously irritating to say (it’s always the irritating self-righteous ones isn’t it?) and refuse to put their names. I’ve turned off anon comments more times than I can count.
thank you for that…..truly.
I am having my own inter-faith struggles right now, as I look at a Christmas tree in my living room – the first I have ever had in my life, and one I don’t fully welcome or embrace but have agreed to for the sake of my husband.
Even he does not understand that Christmas is NOT a nonsecular holiday. And that even if you remove the “religion” from it, it is still steeped in Christian history and tradition. Even after being with a Jew for the last dozen plus years, he does not truly understand the perspective you have provided above.
I recently got into a very large tet-a-tet at (a board which shall not be named) over the difference between “Merry Christmas” and “Happy Holidays”, and the small minded folks over there who could not fathom how one of those is an exclusive statement, and the other is an inclusive one. Why would one PURPOSELY choose to exclude, rather than include?? I just don’t understand….
We are a Jewish home. We are raising Jewish children. And yet, I am married to a nonreligious “majority” person who feels that Christmas was a huge part of his childhood and wants that for our children. I understand his perspective and am willing to give a little on it. It feels unnatural, but is a compromise I’m making.
but I tell you…I remember being that 3 year old. And that 5 year old. And that 7 year old, 9 year old, 11 year old 13 year old etc. It is not easy.
I’m sorry. Emails like that suck dead toads.
Anonymous comments like that suck. The lurch toward a strict theocracy in this country is terrifying, not just for those of us in the religious minority, but anyone who respects the Constitution, and favors a pluralistic society.
As a Jew who currently has a Christmas tree in his living room out of respect for his wife’s upbringing, I am all for respecting other people’s points of view. The new Puritanism, assuming it ever went away, does less to foster respect for other people’s belief systems.
Hear hear!
I just deleted a big long sympathetic rant of my own. I’ll just stand up and clap loudly instead.
PS If the opportunity ever presents itself, you’re very welcome to spend a non-Christmas here one year, reveling in the fact that Dec. 25th is just another day…
I hear you on all of this except one thing. LSP did ask for a Menorah this year. And the dreidel picture she made at school graces our fridge. It’s blue and sparkly and I love it.
Just yesterday a woman walked up to my oldest daughter in the grocery store and said “I bet you can’t wait till Santa comes to your house next week!” Now, we are christian and do celebrate Christmas, but the first thought that popped into my mind was how annoying that she assumed we celebrated Christmas. I can imagine how that makes your children feel.
I’m sorry I didn’t comment on your original post. As a Christian I am frustrated by the Puritanical Fundamentalism that seems to be running rampant right now. (And I also find it ironic that the puritanical’s will get uptight about Christmas Trees and Merry Christmas v. Happy Holidays since the original Puritans eschewed the “heathen traditions” of Christmas carols or Christmas trees…I have found that the Christian right is not amused by my bringing this up.)
I’m not sure how this perspective fits into your experiencs, but I celebrate Christmas and for me there is nothing religious about it.
I was raised Catholic and so Christmas was a part of my experience. But I am not a christian in any sense of the word. We do the tree, the lights, the presents, and even the story of Santa in our family’s version of christmas, and I don’t feel there is any falsehood in claiming that this IS, for our family, a non-secular holiday. My children are told about the Baby Jesus story in the same context as the Hannukah story. We say that this season is about different things to different people. Each part of what we do has meaning for us, but it’s not about religion. For us it’s about bringing light to the darkness of winter, celebrating the cycle of the seasons and nature’s survival through winter. It’s about family and friends.
I can’t imagine how hard it must be for kids to not have Christmas in a culture where it is everywhere. I see no other way around leaving them feeling (however unjustly) that they are being denied something wonderful. This is hard choice that parents must make, I suppose. But I also think that we can create our own traditions and meaningful holidays for our children. For example, I don’t see the harm in hanging some colourful lights around the yard – why can’t it just be about bringing some light and cheer to a very long and dark winter? How does this clash with Judaism? (and I really don’t know, so I’m asking honestly).
The way I see it, Christians usurped the pagans in so many ways to create the modern version of Christmas, I feel no guilt in usurping some of their traditions and giving them a different meaning. Besides, there is nothing remotely Christian about the tree, or the lights, or Santa, or pretty much anything else about Christmas save the nativity scene…so this leaves me rather confused when people say that Christmas cannot be non-secular.