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“Yo-mama-ween”* April 15, 2008

Posted by spacemom in : Current Affairs , 1 comment so far

This was a great weekend. Seriously great!

We skipped gymnastics class yesterday so we could play. play and play and play with Becky’s kids. It was so much fun. Even though her kids are older, our girls got along GREAT with them. They arrived on Saturday just in time for McDonald’s and a run to the Old North Bridge. Everything in this area is a little more spiffy right now because of Patriots’ Day coming up. (What? You’ve never heard of Patriots’ Day? go…follow the link…You probably never heard of Evacuation Day either …and NO it’s not the day before your colonoscopy!)(please read this last link, k?)

Jay and S(11 year old boy) took the girls to their final ice skating session. Becky and I took E( 9 year old girl) to The Orchard (the Alcott house), but a tour was just coming in. We opted to come back. Apparently skating was great with blood and everything! Luna was trying to get ahead of a pack of girls and tripped, managed to smash her lip, her gums and teeth. Blood everywhere! Way to go Luna! The rink was out of ice packs because the day before a woman had done a header in soccer (it’s a turf on one side of the building and the ice rink on the other) and shattered her leg when she landed. So they got Luna a strawberry ice pop. Yeah- try to figure out the blood from a strawberry when it’s a mouth injury!
The good news is that both girls are now ready for basic figure skating 1 or basic hockey skating 1. I WANT them to do hockey, but no, they want figure skating…

The kids wore themselves out and went to bed late. Sunday was just as crazy, but we let the kids hang at home all day. Becky and I went back to The Orchard, since we could get a tour this time. Decided that the Girl Scouts need to be at least in 4th grade before they could handle that tour. At lunch time, Crazy H and Kobiashi arrived to pick up the plastic Little Tike stuff in our yard. We’re getting the new playset in May, so I wanted the plastic to go away. Of course, Crazy H’s sister was there and her kids, so we had 14 people at our house. FOURTEEN PEOPLE! And of course it was lunch time and of course H&K hadn’t thought about the fact their kids were STARVING, so we fed 14 people for lunch.

Soleil had a Girl Scout meeting, E & Luna fell asleep, S watched TV all afternoon. Sigh….

The great thing was that Becky and I got to talk. Becky’s husband, Corey, died January 6, 2000. Military accident. It was the worst day ever. EVER. E was 6 months old at the time. We talked about Corey. We talked about her. I wish I could be there more for her. I wish I could find someway for her to help work through the pain. I wish I could help her see that she’s never going to "Get over" Corey’s death, but that she can find peace with it. These are the times I wished I lived closer.

But that is the nature of today’s world, when we live so far away from each other.

* Didn’t you watch the You Tube from the last post? Hello? We spent the whole weekend saying "Yo-mama-ween". They also brought me a whole crapload of Sabre stuff! I’m in hockey heaven!

 

 

 

Damn Yankees April 13, 2008

Posted by spacemom in : Life...otherwise , add a comment

Americans. Sports. These two words are intertwined. In some of us, the soul of the game has grown with the souls in us. I am a die-hard Buffalo fan. I cheer the Sabres. Now that I am in Boston, I am becoming, a Red Sox fan. I never thought this would be, but since Buffalo only has a AAA baseball team, I can become a Red Sox fan without guilt.

So when I read today that the New York Yankees tore up the concrete to recover an Ortiz jersey that had been planted by a Red Sox fan to curse the Yankees, I was pissed. You are not supposed to tell people that you did that until AFTER they start playing there. What the hell was he thinking?

YOU CURSE A TEAM QUIETLY. THEN WHEN THEY LOSE, YOU START MAKING UP WILD STORIES LIKE A PIANO IN A LAKE OR SOMETHING!
FOR THE LOVE OF THE BASEBALL GODS DON’T SAY ANYTHING UNTIL THE YANKEES PLAY THERE!

Ugh. For your entertainment, I leave you with this video of Ryan Miller (on of the Sabres’ goalies) in his Amp Energy drink ad.

 

Geek abounds April 11, 2008

Posted by spacemom in : Current Affairs , 1 comment so far

Some random blather: 

Sorry about that geek out yesterday. I’ve been stuck in this code for 2 weeks. It had been a back-burner project for several months until 2 weeks ago when it became high priority. Once we hit that, I tried to clear the decks and deal with this code. It has seriously been working my brain and head hard.

 This weekend, my best friend ever, Becky, is coming to visit. She’s bringing her two kids. I am so excited. Her son was born 2 weeks before Jay and I got married, her daughter was born 2 years after that! Her kids are almost exactly 2 years apart and my kids are almost 2 years apart. Granted, her kids are almost 11 and 9 and mine are almost 6 & 4, but HEY, they can play together, right?

Does anyone know how to grow tomatoes? We started a bunch of tomato plants from seeds and I know I need to transfer them, but when? Oh great Internets, please tell me!

I have 2 nights of First Aid/CPR next week. I need to be certified for Girl Scouts. Sucks because I’ve done this before and let it lapse… Oh well. 8 hours isn’t too terrible, is it?

Sigh… How are y’all doing?????
 

“Your worst Nightmare” April 10, 2008

Posted by spacemom in : She Blinded me with Science , 3 comments

"Quaternions are the things that scare all manner of mice and men. They are the things that go bump in the night.They are the reason your math teacher gave you an F. They are all that you have come to fear, and more.Quaternions are your worst nightmare."-from cprogramming.com

I have just spent a marathon session of trying to debug my code that is heavily laced with Quaternions. This 4 dimensional, real and imaginary numbers have plagued my dreams the last few nights. I have been fighting and fighting. Delving deep into code that someone who no longer works for us had written. He did things in a manner that was difficult to understand and follow. He chose not to comment. He wrote in "matlab"(shudder). He counted starting with the number 1! (as opposed to all sane programmers who count from zero).

And today, after going on a chocolate run for the Mission Planners (if the planners ain’t happy, nobody is happy), I found the source of my hell.

I couldn’t make a unit vector to save my life. Oy vey! I need a drink!

Sigh…

Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, my kids are from Alpha Centuri April 9, 2008

Posted by spacemom in : Kids, Mom Phrases , 5 comments

There are days, you know those days, when you are ready to grab your passport, withdraw all of your cash and buy a one-way ticket to an isle where a Cabana boy named Juan can oil you down. Oh, and leave the kids behind while doing this. And what never fails on days like this, is that someone will make a comment about Soleil or Luna. Something along the lines of 

She’s so cute and she is so caring and considerate. She must just be pure pleasure to be with! 

The first thing I normally do when this happens is snap my head around, looking for the person that this crazed individual is talking to, because it can’t be me! Then I realize, oh, they ARE talking to me. How odd. I usually respond with something like "Oh she’s good in small doses" or something to that affect.

The second thing I do is analyze this conversation. I over think sometimes and this topic often makes me think. How do others view my kids? The truth is, they are extremely caring and considerate when we are not around. I have heard nothing but compliments from parents, teachers, daycare personnel on our daughters’ behavior. Somehow, this always surprises me. Perhaps it is because I am the one who has to deal with the kicking and screaming 3 year old. Or who has the 5 year old claim "I don’t like you, Mom!" as she turns her back on me. The screaming when things are working out between them. The crying and hitting. I am always amazed because I do see the harder parts of their personalities. I see the good sides too, but the bad sides I really see!

I guess those little gems hidden in parenting books "They will act worse with the parents because they trust them" are true. My girls can be perfect angels with other adults, but when I have them, forget about it. On those days that Juan is calling for me, I need to remember this:

    They really are well behaved kids. They really are caring. I just don’t get to see that part of them much because they are so comfortable with me.
 

 

The ice skating purple pimp April 8, 2008

Posted by spacemom in : Current Affairs , 2 comments

On Saturday, we spent the majority of the day on our butts. First up was the Boston Skating Club’s Ice Show. One of the Girl Scout people is heavily into this and there were tickets for $5 for the Girl Scouts, so we went. The beginning was painful and we did out best to survive. The kids loved it for quite a while. It did drag on and we were treated to the final performance from Kurt Browning with this outfit

Doesn’t it look like he belongs with Johnny’s Purple Pimp crowd? Hmmm? Johnny, are you holding out on us? 

Anyway, we went from there, to home, to having our neighbor’s daughter babysit the girls while we went to the hockey game. It was very surreal to do hockey in April while texting my sister and nephews the whole game! It was fun, but they were back in Buffalo watching!

On a completely unrelated note, I’ve developed Dr. Jay’s cold/fever. Just what I need, NOT! It’s rather frustrating.

We are moving towards more bike riding and less whining. I am starting a jelly bean jar for whine. If you whine, a jelly bean will go in the jar and you only get the jelly beans back when you stop whining for several days in a row!… Mean, I tell you, I am MEAN!

 

Sabres 3- Bruins 0! April 5, 2008

Posted by spacemom in : Current Affairs , 1 comment so far

Happy Early Birthday to me….

Jay and I secured some Sabre/Bruin tickets a few weeks ago. Although the game meant nothing to either team, (Sabres are out of the playoffs, Bruins are in, but won’t last long), I had a great time. There were so many Sabre fans. It was so great! I wish I could come up with better adjectives, but right now my brain is going to explode….

 

Tomorrow or Monday….Kurt Browning in the Famous Purple Pimp suit! 

What a pain in the neck! April 4, 2008

Posted by spacemom in : In A Family Way , 2 comments

Yesterday was a little odd. Mom and I talked and then I texted to my sister. My sister is not allowed to receive personally calls, emails or anything at work, but we sneak her text messages.

Yesterday, Dad had neck surgery. He was developing bone spurs that were impinging on his nerves. When the doctor got in, there was no disk between those two cervical vertebrae. It was bone on bone. Kind of scary. Anyway, they inserted a new disk, removed bone spur, had to add cadaver bone (I am still not sure why) and send him on his way. Truly! He is going home today! It’s amazing. It’s not for insurance reasons but that he will get more rest at home.

Modern medicine! Wow! 

Green Day April 3, 2008

Posted by spacemom in : It ain't easy being green , 3 comments

Okay, so today I’d like to reach through the computer screen and suggest some green words.

Like Baggu.  These suckers are AWESOME! I wouldn’t say you can get 3 bags of groceries in one (more like 2) but MAN they are convenient and "good for the environment" because, y’all know we’re all about the environment here at Spacemom. Actually, they are easy to fin in a jacket pocket or a purse. And they are pretty cheap ($8 for 1 bag, $22 for 3). You can also find these at Amazon.

I’m still looking into the GreenSwitch. This idea is simple. Install a few of their outlets plus a master switch. The master switch sends an RF signal to the outlets to turn on and off. You’re leaving for the work day? Flip the switch and your computer, router, wifi, printer all turn off. Come home? Flip the switch and they all come back on. However, $58 an outlet & switch is a bit pricey…but I am thinking about it for everything in the computer cabinet and the entertainment center except the DVR.

And how about an in kitchen composter? Pricey, but with a carbon filter to remove odors and a low energy cost, this is a great way to deal with food scraps, if you are like me and just can’t get into composting outside. We are SO getting one of these when we redo the kitchen in two years. It kills me how much food gets tossed away with little thought. At least we can put it back to our garden, right?

What cool and exciting new things have you seen for the environment>

When did the rain begin to fall ?– part 5 April 2, 2008

Posted by spacemom in : Depression , comments closed

The alarm goes off at 6:51am. I snooze it. If Soleil is in bed with me, I ask her to snooze it because she is closer and I can barely move when she’s in bed with us. She goes to my side, Luna goes to Jay’s side. Their chosen parents. By 7:30am, I get out of bed, turn on Clifford (the Big Red Dog) and bring in the clothes that the girls picked out last night. They need to be dressed by the time I am out of the shower. I go into the master bath and start my daily routine.

There’s a bottle of little blue pills, to replace the T4 that my body has failed to make, hypothyroidism. Then the other bottle. The little blue and white capsules. I open the bottle and tap 3 into my hand. Some days, I just take them. Other days, I stare at them while I try to decide if I should take them or throw them out. I close my eyes and imagine the rages I fly into when I don’t take them. The scratches on my arms that I make when I realize how angry I get. I open my eyes and stare at the woman in the mirror. She looks so sad, so beaten. She doesn’t look as if she is old, but more as if she can’t deal with the weariness anymore. I hate that look. I take the pills.

If I miss them, at 2:30pm I get dizzy. By 4pm I can lose my temper with the smallest thing. I have vowed never to hit my children, but the days I forget to take those blue and white embodiments of euphoria, I get close. I have never hit them. I walk away grinding my teeth. My shoulders get tight. When the sun goes down on those nights, my mood shifts from anger to numb. I can’t believe how angry I got. The thoughts I had. I often have the words "I need to leave" go through my head. "Leave to where?" I don’t know.

I meet with my doctor this week. Tomorrow. I am starting to accept that this is me. I am clinically depressed. Post-partum depression was just one manifestation of this, but I have always been depressed. I need to accept that I need the medicine. That I need to exercise several times a week to keep my MIND healthy, not just my body. I need to find a way to like me on those days that I and me don’t get along. And this is how I will always be. This is not just a 1 year thing. Luna turns 4 in June. Soleil turns 6 in July. I’ve been actively fighting this for almost 6 years. Time to accept that this is me and I need to take it as part of me.