Why the long face? January 14, 2010
Posted by spacemom in : Current Affairs, Nance , trackback
I met with a friend last night and she asked if everything was okay in general. She noted that many of my faceboook posts are about stress and frustration. She noted about my post about finding me… So of course, I thought about this last night.
I am a very easy person to understand. If it isn’t perfect, I am not happy. Sad, I know. I can’t imagine where Soleil got her perfectionism. So I am constantly striving for improvement. Being more efficient at work, having the house neater, cleaning better, exercising better, losing the thyroid weight, yada yada yada
So most of my stresses are self induced. This is so sad. I just don’t know how to find time to do everything. I want to be the best mom, the best wife, the best worker, be healthy, eat well, exercise, read more…. You see the point.
I am working on relaxing my need for perfection. For example, I just asked my troop if I could beg off the camping weekend. I am trained for camping, but there is one other adult who is trained. I stayed overnight last year, but I really would love to sleep in my own bed at home this year. And I think both girls will go during the day, so I could stay at home and be with Dr. Jay during the day. What a concept!
I am also relaxing more about work. Let’s just not stress about getting 8 hours of work done in the 8 hour work day. I work on weekends and Mondays without pay. The jobs get done when they get done. I can’t stress myself over this anymore. There was an incident earlier in 2009 that set me into this mode, and we suddenly had to account for every minute of our work day, and these two things combined to add that stress. Go away stress.
I still worry about the kids and try to yell less, and snuggle more, but that is hard.
So yeah, I am constantly in worry and stress mode(sort of). Except for when things work. Like last weekend, when we won the opportunity to skate at Fenway Park (yes! Ice Skate. In a baseball stadium!). I had bought some raffle tickets as a donation and was shocked that we won. It was perfect. Literally perfect. The girls and Jay and I enjoyed the ice time. It was GREAT!
So there are many times that I am a happy person, but it is easier to get out my stress by writing about it.
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