This has been a very busy weekend. With parents in town, we were able to run off to IKEA on Wednesday and pick up some furniture (end table, coffee table) and some kitchen cabinets for our utility room/pantry. Thursday was nice with family, including Dr. Jay’s brother, Lee, coming to town and the in-laws being here. Friday was chaos, and Saturday was as well. Soleil played goalie for her team and did well. Luna showed off her ice skating skills. Jay and I? We got tickets to "Capitol Steps" as a friend was ill. Then we had dinner and went downtown for the night. Jay had gotten us an hotel room. It was nice. We went to a local dessert place and mostly relaxed. No kids, sleep all night, Ah….

Yesterday, the TV was brought home (man, it looks BIG…50"). We have all of the speakers waiting to be installed. AV guy is a total ass and never showed up on Friday. So…a new AV guy is coming today to see if he can finish the job or not. I hope he can as we have speakers all over the place and the new receiver ready to go…

I hit a frustrating point this Sunday, when I needed a pair of pants and discovered that I can only fit in 3 pairs of jeans. I have been doing the T-Tapp exercises, but I have also been careless on watching my eating habits. I wonder how much working at home is affecting things too. So, I am stepping it up about the exercise (trying to be very good on them) and cutting out a few extras. Not going for seconds, taking half a dessert/sweet instead of all that I really want. The little things that add up. I just want to fit back into the clothes that I already have instead of buying new stuff. It really is a never ending battle, is it not? The American woman and the battle of the bulge. We want our cake and to fit in our clothes too. We want to be healthy, but damn that martini is good. Such a frustrating situation.

Oh well, at least we got to relax for a short time this weekend.


The bullets fly again

A prethanksgiving post: Things I am thankful for

  • 2 healthy and wonderful children
  • 4 parents (ok in-laws count) who drive us crazy, but we still love them all
  • A wonderful sister
  • A good job that allows me flexibility and helps us maintain our lifestyle
  • A wonderful set of friends who prop me up when I need it
  • The internet friends who keep me going when I need a laugh
  • That I live in a country where I can be atheist and not be afraid for my life, just deal with people who wish me to change.
  • That I have a home, warm clothes, and food to eat
  • I have enough money to buy extras for those who can’t
  • We have medical insurance that allows us to deal with our physical and mental issues.
  • There is more… but I have a meeting to run to!

achoo! Addition progress

Now that the weather is turning colder, the work on the addition has moved indoors. The floor is in, the railing for the stairs is being added, the shelves are in downstairs, the stain is being applied to the windows, and we get a freezer today! Okay, the last really has nothing to do with the addition except that we might as well do it now. We’ve been meaning to get a freezer for a while now and this is a good time. I like the idea of being able to stock up when needed and keep enough food around if we need.

We can move furniture into the room on Tuesday. This is good since we have the IL coming

The dust here is killing me slowly. I am hyper sensitive right now because of the bee shots. This totally sucks. I am tired and my sinuses hurt every day. I can barely keep myself together some nights and my voice cracks as we read at night.

Last night, we went out to see Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, part 1. Yes we got pre-screening tickets. It was very very good. I will only give away that Daniel Radcliffe looks awesome in a bra! 🙂 The cut between the movies is a good place and I felt that it was very true to the book.

okay…too much too do…too much dust!

Rolling the genetic dice

I sometimes am absolutely blown away by the wonders of our DNA. This twisting double helix, tiny and beautiful, containing all of the parts that make us up, hidden and exposed, dominant and recessive, active and dormant, is the core of all of us. I look at my daughters and I wonder how two children with the same parents could be so incredibly different?Here’s a quick chart of the differences.

 Luna  Soleil
 Loud  Quiet
 Extrovert  Introvert
 Wants to be read to every night Wants to read in bed every night
 Lots of friends  Not many friends
 No friend is close  All friends are close
 Is afraid that nobody likes her  Knows that only a few like her well
 Will goof  Is afraid to goof
 Follows rules even if they are not reasonable Will question authority wisely
 Likes to tease me to the end of my patience. Knows where I am ready to lose it and stops teasing me!





I understand the physical differences, but the internal, who these kids are differences, are so….DIFFERENT, it drives me crazy. Luna teases and teases and teases. Soleil will tease, but quickly stops when she sees that the person is getting upset. I can take Soleil on the playground and she finds a single friend to play with while Luna will have the whole playground wrapped around her finger. However, Soleil’s friendships run deep and Luna is terrified that nobody likes her.

Quiet.Loud.Goofy.Demanding.Plays well with her sister. Loves American Girl Dolls. These things are in common. But when it comes to other things, I do have to wonder.

Another fragile moment

This weekend, we drove down to DC (I forget how far that really is from Boston) and visited with family for the second of the kids’ generation Bar/Bat Mitzvahs. (Boys are Bar and Girls are Bat). The first kid was 3 years ago, now things start rolling. I think Luna is the last in this generation who will actually do the Bat Mitzvah.

If you aren’t familiar, I should tell you that when a Jewish child turns 13, they are considered an adult in the community and read from the Torah (the first 5 books of the Bible). Their religious school is all about training for this and learning about the culture and connections to the past.  In other words? This is a big deal. No, wait, a Big Deal (capitals are required).

We stayed with our cousins who have three crazy kids and 2 golden retrievers. I am allergic to the dogs. By the second day there, I could barely talk, but I love the cousins too much and the dogs too much to stay at a hotel.

The reception party for the Bar Mitzvah was held at a lovely center, with outdoor appetizers. I was kicked out by my children because there were too many bees there. Suckage…. I really felt fragile between the bees and the dogs. What? I can’t be outdoors because of the bees? WTF? No!!!!

And I love those dogs! I am not going to change my plans because of everything that will kill me.

I know, most of the reactions (physical and people’s reactions) are due to my current immune state. I am a bit weak right now and my immune system is in overdrive. It will take about 1 month to deal with recovery from the latest reaction. Sigh.

I just don’t need to be reminded how fragile I am right now.

A focus on cleaning

November is always a tough month. The weather turns cold, but without the snow. Precipitation is usually rain, cold and penetrating. I hate going to the Mall because this is the start of the economic frenzy we call "Holiday shopping" (NOTE! Hanukkah comes early this year, so I am already pretty good on gifts). I cant stand the crush of people at the malls.

I don’t feel I can go out, nor do I feel I can stay in. What do to?

So today, I want to talk about cleaning. Being in the middle of construction, our house is, a mess. There is dust everywhere. There are dusty foot prints down our hallways. We want to start organizing our pantry and new storage area, but we can’t yet, so there are things out of place EVERYWHERE.

Our downstairs room is squished to half of its normal size due to new furniture that goes in the new room and that current stuff that is squashed against a wall where the new wallboard is up. sigh. It’s a mess.

Add to this 2 kids that are not keen on cleaning and are natural hoarders (aren’t all kids?), I feel out of control.

We have cleaners that come twice a month. It’s expensive to me and lately, a few things have been broken, and I hate having to pick up for the cleaners (although that is also the bright point because then it gets done).

We are considering dropping the cleaners. Or at least dropping to once a month. Here’s the logic:

  1. I am now working from home 2 days a week. This allows me to get some of the cleaning done.
  2. I really hate doing a once every 2 week cleanup. I want to slowly encourage the girls to clean up, so maybe we can make this part of Monday afternoons once our ice skating session ends today.
  3. It’s a lot of money that could be used for something else, but it’s not so much that it is putting us out.

I don’t know. I like the convenience of never mopping, or dusting, but in reality, does it really take that long? No. I mean they take 2 hours every 2 weeks, but I could probably keep things in shape over a month or so and let the cleaners do the deep cleaning once a month. I also know that this woman needs the financial help. I wouldn’t want to cut her when we certainly can afford things. Sigh. Such a tough call.

What are your thoughts on cleaners? Love ’em? Hate ’em?

A hail of bullets

  • Doing better from Tuesday, but I am still exhausted. An allergic reaction causes fatigue.I also still have a swollen tongue and throat which feels terrible at night.
  • If you really are all annoyed about peanut policies at your school/work/daycare? Screw it. Trust me, as the second time of going through this, you do NOT want anyone having to go through anaphylaxis because you insist on packing nuts. It is scary enough as an adult who understands what is going on, it must be terrifying for a child and for the parents.
  • It is pouring today. Finally feels like fall.
  • The house project is moving a bit slower than expected. The wallboard is up, but the plaster work that was to be done this week was held up due to another project. The hope is to get the floor in, sanded and coated next week.
  • Today is pretty quiet at the house. I may get a nap in if I can’t get my hair done.
  • T-Tapp is going. I stopped measuring and just decided to go for 12 weeks and then reevaluate. I am doing every other day with 15 minutes, although, when I can do the 50 minute workout, I do. I am not sure I am getting any body sculpting out of this (not yet), but I have to say my depression has gone down and if I can manage my depression through this sort of exercise? I can save some $$ at the gym!
  • The writing is coming along fine. I am 10% of the way through. Not bad for 5 days in. Oh, wait, that’s 10% of the month. Doh! 🙂
  • Girl troubles in grade 3 suck
  • My Girl Scout troop is camping this weekend without me. Yea! I get to relax.


So thanks to my BFF Becky, I am writing a novel this month. Yes, in addition to hosting my in-laws for Thanksgiving (no problem), hoping the new room will be DONE before Thanksgiving, knowing that Dr. Jay has to run off to DC for a day trip, going to Bethesda for a Bar Mitzvah and trying not to drop dead from anaphylaxis, I am writing a novel.

Am I an idiot or what?

Of course, I will probably never let anyone read it (except Becky. Because she is making me write this, then she has to read the crap I come up with). I tried this last year and totally failed. I got to 15,000 words and stopped. Sigh. This time, it is completely different. I haven’t found a struggle with my character yet. She is doing great and surprizing me when I get to certain situations. I have set up a) a character and b) a starting point for the plot. That’s it. From here, I will see what my character tells me to do.

I also decided to write in first person because that is so much easier for me. I hope I can pull this off, I doubt it, but hey, I am putting this out there!

Anyone else doing this? Buehler?

Dear Body


I hate you. There. I said it. Plain and simple. I hate you.

I went in for my bee/hornet shots yesterday at 3:20. I got home from the ER at 10. Sigh

My tongue swelled and my throat tightened after the second set of shots. We did an epi-pen, plus 2 antihistamines plus steroids. After laying down for 15 minutes, I still had the symptoms, so we did another epi-pen. I finally got the shakes from this epi-pen and my tongue went down, but not my throat. The doctor insisted that I go to the ER. I asked for my husband to drive me, but NO, she insisted on an ambulance.

I personally hate the attention these things bring. But I really didn’t have a choice. They came, tried an IV on one side, failed, did the other side.Stuck all sorts of electrodes on me to check for things like heart trouble from the epis and breathing issues. Gave me one of those oxygen thingies that go in your nose, but it was too big. Sigh.

The hospital was too busy, so I got to stay in the hallway. Things calmed down in my throat by the time I got there, but the protocol is 4-6 hours from last epi-pen to keep secondary reactions away. It was a fun busy place (okay, not fun), but busy.

Body, I am tired of this. I can’t be afraid of this, but the anaphylaxis is really damn scary. I don’t like it. I don’t like worrying about getting air. This sucks. Can we please let me get some sort of tolerance to this?


In other news, I am in the market for an emergency GPS. I think I found a good one thanks to my friend Chad. Who happened to marry the daughter of one of my supervisors. After I met him. Weird world, no?

Have I mentioned I hate my body?

House update

I’ve been fairly quiet on the house front. Things are moving, mistakes have been made, concrete has been poured… It is all going.

We started this process in April, when Dad had surgery, by meeting with friends who are architects. They worked with us coming up with a beautiful plan to create a new room that connected with both levels of our home and then to move the laundry (currently in a bathroom, WTF?) to a section of the garage. Well, the bids started coming in and it was far more $$$ than I had expected. We cut the job back to just the new room and we’ll fix the laundry situation later.

As of now, we have the exterior almost completely done. We have windows in (a fiasco), and we should have the insulation in tomorrow and wallboard done by Friday. The heating and cooling are tied in, but not operational. Lighting is wired except the wall sconces, but again, not operational. Window seat was messed up by 3 people, so it will extend into the room, but I don’t mind. Life will go on. 

We’ve been able to work within our budget pretty well, but I just don’t know if it will be done by Thanksgiving. It seems like there is a lot to do, but maybe it will go faster now that they can work on the interior. There is an inspection issue where the town wouldn’t let them insulate until the windows and siding are up. Now that is done (last window went in Friday), I hope we can blaze ahead!

I have photos, but I might wait until we are done with the whole project. I hope it finishes soon. So tired of people working at the house so much!