Yes, that is a statement, not a question.
The end of the calendar year is difficult. Then we have the end of the school year. Then the start of the school year.
There is no end, nor beginning. We have created these crazy, artificial marks for reasons that are old and behind us all. Does it really matter that I am 40 today and 41 in April? Or that my children at 9.46 and 7.49 instead of 9.5 and 7.5? Time is such a strange concept.
I was once told that time was human perception and it was a way to prevent our brains from experiencing everything at once…
I think it is failing right now!
I looked around the kitchen, rather surprised to hear a duck while doing the dishes. He stood on the other side of the dishwasher door, his fine green head tilted at me.
Okay, a duck. In my kitchen.
He cocked his head sidewise and stared at me. This was not what I had been thinking about. In fact, I had been thinking about Luna. She’s been ice skating a bit lately and she has an expo this weekend. We forgot about the date and scheduled something else at the same time. Crap.
What the hell? Now there were two ducks staring at me. Where did the other one come from? Besides, I don’t have time for this! I also have to get Soleil to her hockey practice. She’s really getting it down now, this who hockey goalie stuff. If we could only work on her focus. She has trouble focusing at school too. It’s really becoming a problem.
The original drake hopped up on the dishwasher door. Brave bastard. Where did that other duck come from? And the others? There’s 4 ducks standing in my kitchen. The dog is outside. I should go get her. She’ll scare the ducks away, but she is such a scared dog. I am so glad that she did well at the pet hotel this trip. I worry about the next trip. We’ll be gone longer. Does she miss us? Does she think we’ll be leaving her forever?
Wow!Simultaneous quack!I didn’t know ducks could do that. Holy hell? They are multiplying faster than I can think and three of them are now perching on the top rack of the dishwasher. Can ducks actually perch? I mean, the webbed feet and all. Damn, I need to actually walk the dog today. Poor thing. And email. I have a bunch of emails to send out for the data analysis project. Too many things!
“QUACK, QUACK, QUACK, QUACK!”
Okay, this is getting surreal. The ducks are taking over my kitchen, they get are getting braver and braver and I can’t get to the broom closet right now to scare them away. Oh, right, I have to sort through the drawers and pull out the extra clothes that the girls don’t fit in anymore. I can’t believe how fast they are grow…OUCH! That damn duck just bit me! Well, more of a nibble than a bite, but STILL! OW!
The room is now filled with ducks all creating a cacophony of quacks. They all move closer and I can see now that every thought of every task I need to complete brings another duck into existence. They advance with those brown and orange beaks nipping, biting, pecking. I am quickly drowning in a sea of water fowl and destroyed by all the things I need to do in my life.
And that is how I was nibbled to death by ducks.