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sunshine October 30, 2008

Posted by spacemom in : Current Affairs, I dream of sleep, In A Family Way , add a comment

I was going to post something bright and pithy. It’s a nice day and that usually puts me in a good mood. But I am not in a good mood. I think it is lack of sleep.

My parents arrived on Saturday, shortly before Jay, I and the girls returned from a party. I was pretty wiped out and wanted to nap, but my parents’ arrival changed that. The week was crazy, but for some reason, my parents have taken to going to bed around 8:30-9. So…that is before the girls go to sleep. The time that they were here, they did clean out my fridge and do the dishes. The picked up Soleil from the afterschool program twice. But when I asked for a night off, they couldn’t do it. Nor would they help with bedtime and putting the girls to sleep or read to them.

It was a frustrating visit. They stopped by only because they were in the Northeast. But still…. I’ve been getting to bed around 1am, and Luna’s been having nightmares so she comes in and sleeps with me. She’s not the calmest of sleepers.

So, I think this is why I am in a bad mood. Jay should land around 9pm and then be home by 10:30 (luggage and all that). My parents left this morning.

 

IF I have any readers left…. September 17, 2008

Posted by spacemom in : Current Affairs, Depression, I dream of sleep , 2 comments

Well, HI There!

Yeah, if I haven’t depressed the crap out of you yet and you’re still reading, KUDOS to you!

Doing better, but I still can’t sleep.

Anyhooo….I am starting to get a bit concerned about the economy. I mean, we’ve already switched to using our Discover Card to buy gas the past two months because we were getting a 5% cash back on gas pruchases until Sept 30. And we were all over that since we go and get gift cards from the cash back and buy things that we pretend are free! Like Soleil’s backpack this year.  With the embroidery, the monogram of our last name, it cost us a grand total of ….ready? $3! From Lands’ End, no less! Since we have a Sears with Lands’ End near us, I can call in an order and there is no shipping. Add the gift card from Discover? $3!

But seriously there are some problems here. How many bailouts is the government going to do? My sister has worked at a large bank since she was 18.  This bank deals with mortgages. What if she loses her job? What do people who are barely making it by do? What if this is a cold winter? In the Northeast, oil heat is common. I remember when we were on oil heat, we were PISSED when our oil went to $1.50 a gallon. HA HA HA HA HA! It is now between $3.70-$4.20!!!!

So what to do? I wish I had some answers. Will the markets crash? Just Wall Street? Or the Global Markets?

I am glad I asked the Girl Scouts to bring a can of food for the town parade. We’re donating what we get to the food pantry in town. We need to do something, and this is a start!

Damn it! September 16, 2008

Posted by spacemom in : Current Affairs, Depression, I dream of sleep , add a comment

I just had a huge post written and then there was a great sucking noise as the computer decided to suck it out of existance.

Frick.

I am not in the mood to retype it all so I’ll leave things here:

Tired… September 10, 2008

Posted by spacemom in : Depression, I dream of sleep , 2 comments

If you haven’t figured out (if you don’t have the password), I am going through a spot of depression. I raised my meds. Lovely. To do this means I get insomnia. Honest to G-d lie awake in the bed insomnia. I was reading a book until 3am the other morning. Last night, I finally collapsed at midnight. Closer to a real bedtime, but when you aren’t sleeping, the rest of your life crashes down too. On top of depression. And the girls are mostly sleeping now (yes- add fist pump here)

Girl Scout season has started! Our first meeting is Friday! Whoohoo! 

So, maybe more tomorrow, but today? I am just really tired. 

A better day September 2, 2008

Posted by spacemom in : Kids, Depression, I dream of sleep, In A Family Way , 2 comments

Today is the FIRST DAY OF FIRST GRADE! Very very exciting. Last week we met the teacher, Mrs C. Today, Soleil climbed on the bus with our new neighbors and waved goodbye as she rode away. Sigh… I will try to post photos later. She is so excited to go. I am bummed that the first 6 days are half days, but eh. What can you do?

Now that it is fall, we are getting back into our crazy activity schedule. Soleil is doing violin, Saturday afternoons. Luna has the choice of doing ice skating (because she is so upset that Soleil passed the last level and she didn’t) and I signed her up for gymnastics (read run around happy for 45 minutes) and then we have swimming Monday afternoons. We’re only doing the first session of swimming followed by  the second session of ice skating. Sigh. So busy!

Fall does this. It rolls all of the fun things together and makes it one busy pile of goo!

I have been working with Jay to update our Google calendars (yes, we share them with each other) and then we work from there…

Today is a better day. I upped my meds, but this leads to insomnia, so I have to fight that then…..

Up to 10,000 words on my book! 1/5 of the way there! 

The morning after October 26, 2007

Posted by spacemom in : I dream of sleep , 2 comments

Rough rough night in the space house. Luna developed a croupy cough. She even vomited up during one cough. Not the "stomach bug" vomit, but the "I’m coughing so hard I have to vomit" one. Poor thing. She would only take Jay to hold onto.

Then Soleil came in at 1 in the morning with the SAME cough. EEK! Jay wants to know how long I locked them outside while he was gone! (I didn’t) This morning, the daycare teacher told Jay that several kids have this cough, so clearly Luna caught it and shared with her sister.

It was nice to have Jay back. We are far more disorganized with two of us. I don’t know how I am more organized alone, but I am… 

Sunday, Soleil will be consecrated as part of the Hebrew school. She is very excited and has been learning the Sh’ma, one of the holiest prayers in Judaism (it basically is the declaration of one G-d, not three parts, just one) and she sings it EVERY NIGHT. (I am personally getting sick of it). Her grandparents are making a special trip to come and see her because this event is so important. I really don’t know much about it and I keep reading  ‘consecrate’ as ‘concentrate’ as if she were a can of orange juice. Oh well, at least I made Jay promise he would be in charge of their religious training if he wanted Jewish children.

I have an acupuncture appointment this weekend. Wish my pincushion body good luck! And I plan on starting the dress this weekend. Measure and cut the fabric! :) Promise I will take photos!

 

Where’s my jacket? September 26, 2007

Posted by spacemom in : Mom Phrases, I dream of sleep , 2 comments

I am looking for my jacket. You know, the little white one that ties in the back?

I ended up volunteering to be a co-leader for Soleil’s Daisy Girl Scout troop. And since I am one of the few who were not afriad of computers, I am running the Yahoo group.

 Yeah, this is what I needed. More work. Way to go Nance!

 

Next up: learn how to smash one’s head into a wall while juggling kids, husband and a spacecraft

 

Asleep? September 21, 2007

Posted by spacemom in : I dream of sleep , add a comment

It’s 10:45pm…

 My kids are just asleep.

How the HELL do they have so much energy?

 Must go get sleep now

 

A warm body September 8, 2007

Posted by spacemom in : Depression, I dream of sleep , 5 comments

Before I start this post, I want to point out that I am in a pretty bad place right now. The funk that started before Cleveland has settled in for the long run. This is tough and I am not a happy camper at all right now. But that’s for another day.

Most mornings, I wake with a small body curled next to me. Often it is two small bodies.

Soleil will wake up around 7am to climb into bed with us. Sometimes, she had nightmares and will come in without me noticing her there. I will turn over at night and feel the gentle breath on my skin and wake up to see her perfect face there. Luna comes in almost every morning at 5:30-6. I think the birds wake her. She comes to my side of the bed since Daddy puts her back in her bed. I am too lazy to get up and do that. I hold out an arm for her to use to help her climb into our bed. Then she curls against me, back to back and sleeps.

I wake to the sound of multiple breathing patterns. Luna is loud. She snores and I often wonder if she has some problem with her throat. Soleil is quiet. Their breath is no longer the swell smell of baby breath, but I still enjoy it.

Once, we would be awoken multiple times a night by a screaming child. Four consecutive hours of sleep was a luxury. Now we have traded the wake ups for night time visitors.

And to be honest, those are two warm bodies I do not mind at all.

 

Quiet day July 31, 2007

Posted by spacemom in : I dream of sleep, In A Family Way , 3 comments

Sorry no real posts today. I did some web design at work and then went home early and took a 2 hour nap. I am lucky. The building we work in was built in the 1930s. You know, when women were "weak" once a month. So all of the women’s rooms have beds in them (I kid you NOT). I am planning on taking in a pillow tomorrow. I’ll take 1 hour naps at work during the day to help with the sleep. I spoke to my bosses and they both suggest using my sick time to get better. I agree.

In addition to the mono, I have anemia caused by the mono. My liver enzymes are off as well, a slight case of hepatitis. Apparently, 90% of mono sufferers develop hepatitis while the mono runs its course.

I am angry and frustrated.

Then we receive news that Lauren is having some bone marrow trouble. She is getting a few pints of Cleveland’s finest in a transfusion this week. I feel stupid for being upset that I am sick when Lauren is fighting cancer. She’s got one more chemo round left. She might have to miss the fall semester of her sophomore year. This bites. 

Lastly, Jay started the methatrexate yesterday. Turns out it is an intramuscular injection. Ick…