Double trouble January 20, 2010
Posted by spacemom in : She Blinded me with Science, Depression, Dr. Jay , 1 comment so farI made a vow around Christmas time, that I would not let work drive me nuts. I would exercise more. I would get out of the office and I wouldn’t let anyone, not even my supervisor tell me that time in the office equals productivity….because it doesn’t.
However, around the same time, I noticed Jay was, well, short tempered a bit. He was tired and grouchy. Our trip to Buffalo didn’t help too much as his diet was off and he was getting his next fill up (Remicade treatment) when we returned home. He is always a little off right before a fill up. Then, the American Astronomical Society’s winter meeting came and he went to that. Now that he is back in a rhythm, I had hoped things would calm down, but they haven’t. He is overwhelmed with work. He has 5 papers to review and comment. Several meetings to attend, collaborators to respond to, proposals to write, you get the idea. Then at AAS, he was asked to work on a project that may or may not take off. If it does, he is even deeper in work.
All of this pressure is getting him depressed. I don’t mean as deep as mine, but he is restless, tired, needs to be happy. I don’t know what to do for him.
I, on the other hand, have started to do better about work. I moved my office around (LOVE IT!) and I am focusing on quality, scheduling exercise in and relaxing in general. But the seasonal changes are kicking in and I am seeing my own depression moving into place. How to deal with it? I don’t know. I often lean on Jay when I am staring into the abyss. He needs me now and I am trying to stay level.
Yesterday, I lost him at work. It was time to go so we wouldn’t be late getting the girls. He had left his office and his phone was in his office. I checked a few places, but failed to find him. When he finally looked at the time, we were 15 minutes late and didn’t make it to the after school care on time. Since he was so upset and stressed, I bit back my stress and forced myself to stay calm.
I am not really sure how to deal with this. I am going away for the weekend and I don’t want him stressed and yelling every 5 minutes. But how to stop someone else falling when you yourself aren’t able to hold up? I have no clue..
